1. |
Timothee Chalamet
03:49
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I can't compete with Timothee Chalamet
Got two left feet and a few right leaning views
I can't believe how a catch like you
Can turn a cold, chunk of coal into flames
Can't believe how it feels this good
There better be some trees through all this wood
Can't conceive that a crook like me
Could get a hook, line and sinker
On this pretty, little stinker
You giving me grounds to sue
What you put me through
Baby, tell me that you feel it too
Why you have to be so cruel
I get a Heart-Throb Hatred, loving you
Cos it's too good to be true
I may not be on any IMDb
I may be living on a lifestyle half my age
I may counting on a made up story
And who wouldn't choose Tim Chalamet
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2. |
Backseat Driving
03:47
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3. |
Give PC a Chance
04:14
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Jews are all greedy
Gypsies have flees
The working class are lazy
And black guys are thieves
The Polish are stupid
Gays all have aids
Muslims and terrorists
All look the same
Women are frigid
Except when they're sluts
Don't get me started on the trans
I can't keep up
Next time could we give PC a chance
But I want to cause offence
I don't think it makes a difference
Because I was born in 1944
When times were hard just beyond the war
I'm a progressive guy I swear
I remember voting Tony Blair
And in the 1960s
I grew my hair
With people called the hippies
And you weren't there
We did drum circles in sandy hills
And burnt our underwear
Don't call me a dinosaur
In 40 years you'll end up just as uncool
You bloody millennials
Get me out of this Uber pool
This time could we give PC a chance
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4. |
Evenings and Weekends
03:44
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Maybe I could be a fun dad that you only see every month at the truck show weekend
Baby I gotta rat in my basement that probably needs a best friend
I could let you wear my Stetson while I make a microwave dinner out of leftover lasagna
Why you gotta be all crying when I'm tryna make the most of what is left
Evenings and weekends
Oh what a luxury
A custody of kings
I'm all for feelings
Oh But it don't mean shit
I take the hit
It's not even about the kid
I'll be out at the back in the garage if you need anything
Maybe I could meet a fun mum at a darts club in a sports bar hunched over chicken wings
Do you come here often enough to make a saving on a membership?
Maybe we could go out dancing after drinking dilute spirits at a dive hole Hawaiian theme
I could show you a photo of the boy and tell you how much I've been missing him
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5. |
Hands Underneath
03:13
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6. |
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I am the face of Smethwick Kitchens
But my heart belongs to you
I may have signed something with Nestle
But my bones are signed to you
Just because I said that I love kellogg bran flakes
Doesn't mean I can't love you
Just because I've sold out doesn't mean I'm strung out
I may have no integrity but I've got you
You're the only product that i truly endorse
Now I've realised the most exclusive deals can't be bought
Mm denon.
Not a single sponsor gives me wealth
But they do give me an awful lot of money (honey)
And every little helps
I'm on brand
and that's gotta count for something
20 grand
To keep my heart a pumping
For you
It's all for you
I did it for you
Oh baby it's true
and I know that I've made compromises
just so that I have no surprises
and it means I have to end this song by reminding the listener to go to Smethwick's for all their kitchen related needs
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7. |
Interlude
02:02
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8. |
Don't [Blank] Much
03:00
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9. |
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10. |
Complete Works of Life
04:11
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I never should have died in 2017
My agent could have lied in my obituary
But he saved all his best lines for David Bowie
Who was that again?
I never should have I tried to make myself believe
That I would have made headlines in at least one magazine
But I'm always on the side of Leonard Cohen
Who was that again?
Hold your inevitable standing ovation
Oh good. You're already holding it
I'm told that memorials should be celebrations
But can mine be sad, please?
There's a blanket ban on streamers
And an auction on my B-sides
Be careful with my demo tapes
Make sure the highest bidder can't decide
What happens to my complete works of life
Imagine if I died in 2016
I could have been alright. I could have made it, baby
But I always miss deadlines for compilations
Who were they again?
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Frank Foucault London, UK
Is this guy for real?
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